Lose It All
by BonneyQ
Summary: Gray's reliving one of his worst memories. What will wait for him once he's awake? [Spoilers Chapter 499]


**AN:** So, I am not chapter 499's dialogues number 1 fan and I was all set with rewriting the whole chapter to dramatize it to a level that I would enjoy, add missing scenes and the whole shebang but rereading the chapter I just gave up. Nothing good was happening, so I won't push to write something I don't like. I never did and I plan on not doing ever.

BUT I still wanted to write something, so I decided to write some fluff for whoever needed – this was what I was planning on before I read the chapter this morning. I hope this helps whoever is in pain with the chapter. :)

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 **Lose It All**

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 _He was shaking so much he could swear he could hear his bones shackling inside him. He had been dead, but then his heart was beating again and he was brought back to one of the worst sights he could ever remember having._

 _Her blue hair was messy and covering her face, but by the way she was lying on the ground, by the way the pool of blood got larger each second around her stomach area, Gray knew. He knew she wasn't going to wake up._

 _Juvia's sweet voice inside his head saying she was saving him with her blood, that she would still live inside him, telling him not to be sad._

 _Gray slowly turned her body around and the tears finally fell. She was still warm, but her eyes were closed, her breathing had stopped and… there was no more life inside her._

 _She was gone._

" _This isn't happening." Gray's eyes were wide as he looked down at her, pure shock in his mind. "Juvia…" He whispered and her voice saying her life belonged to him was his break point. Gray let out a scream of pure horror, pain, sadness and didn't care who heard him. He was in so much pain he could barely breathe. "Juvia… Please, just open your eyes." He tried to bargain with her, his forehead resting on hers. "Please, don't go. Please. Not when I just figured it out. Please."_

 _He opened his eyes and that time hers were open, staring up at the sky, grey and opaque. Lifeless._

" _No, please." Gray sobbed. "NO!"_

 **#**

Gray sat on the bed, his heart beating so fast he stopped breathing and then breathing so hard his head and his chest hurt, sweat cooling his body. The light hurt his eyes and he had to blink a few times until he was used to it.

He was so confused. He had been- Where was- What was happening?

Pushing the blanket off him, he got up, didn't even put on his shoes and walked out the door, trying to understand what was going on. He knew the place looked familiar, he knew he was safe there but even so, he just needed to- he didn't know what but he needed it so much it hurt him.

Gray arrived at a very tidy living room and he heard the sound of laughter, his heart fluttering with the sound and he followed it, curious to what he was going to find.

It was a kitchen and Juvia was there, by the sink, her hair in a ponytail and her back was to him, but he knew that shade of blue anywhere. She was alive. And just a few steps away. Alive. Safe. Breathing.

"Daddy!" The loud shriek made Gray almost jump. He was so focused on the fact Juvia was alive he almost forgot about the others there. The person who had screamed so loud, was a little girl that couldn't be older than five. She was seated on a chair, a plate with toast and jam in front of her. Her dark blue hair was in pigtails and her eyes were in a shade of blue he knew by heart. The same of Juvia's eyes. "You slept late!" She accused him.

"Oh, good morning, Gray-sama!" Juvia looked over her shoulder and smiled his way. "How did you sleep?"

"I-" Gray was confused. "I-"

" _Violet!_ Don't try to get your brother's cereal, young lady. You had your share." Juvia told the little girl in a stern tone and Gray saw Violet's hand retreat from the tray in front of the high chair a baby was, eyes closing as if he would fall asleep at any second. The baby's hair was dark just like Gray's and his cheeks were chubby and rosy just like they were supposed to be. "Just because he's distracted it doesn't mean you can snatch them."

"Sorry, Mommy." Violet looked down and Gray saw her put a handful of cereal inside her mouth and he couldn't help it but to smile a little at the action; she had succeeded and was not sorry at all. That was his girl.

 _His girl?_ Gray frowned and he remembered a newborn version of the girl in front of him being put in his arms, and then a little older baby smiling at him as he tickled her, she walking in wobbly legs, she trying to imitate his positions as he trained at the backdoor.

"Violet." He breathed and he looked at the sleepy boy and a new wave of memories hit him, that time featuring the little boy and Gray knew who that was. "Gris."

"Gray-sama?" Juvia asked and stepped closer to him.

"Juvia." Gray put his hands on her cheeks, looking at her. She was older, there were some faint lines around her eyes and she looked much more mature, but still the same beautiful woman he knew. "You are here. You are _alive_."

The blunette frowned and then understanding passed on her face. "Did you have another nightmare?" She put a hand over his, her eyes softening when he nodded. "What about?"

"You were-" He gulped. "You died. You gave me your blood and you died. I had you in my arms and you were dead."

"I know, I know. And I know how you get when you wake up alone; you get disoriented." Juvia nodded. "But it's been ten years since that day, Gray-sama." She told him. "Juvia came back to you. Remember? You kissed me, we started dating." His hands rested on her shoulders and Juvia's touched his cheek. "Two years later you asked me to marry you." She smiled at him. "One of the best days of my life." Even Gray offered her a small smile when he remembered her in her beautiful white gown. "Three years after that, we had Violet and seven months ago we had Gris."

Gray nodded, relaxing a bit after his memories finally fell into place. "I remember. But I was alone when I woke up, Juvia." He told her in a whisper. After all that happened with Zeref, Gray's nightmares had been so intense and realistic that sometimes he woke up exactly like he did that morning: confused and afraid. "I couldn't remember right away, I was confused and hurt when I thought you were still dead."

"I'm sorry I left, but the children were up." Juvia told him in an apologetic tone. "And you looked so tired yesterday, Juvia wanted for you to rest a bit more."

He pulled her for a tight hug for a few moments and he kissed the top of her head. "As long as you are here now."

"Always." Juvia smiled and looked up to him, stealing a peck on the mouth and Gray felt his love throb with love. "Now, Juvia needs to finish our breakfast." She pushed him away slightly. "Violet, honey, it seems your Daddy is sad and he needs a big tight hug from his favorite daughter."

Violet gasped and stood up on her chair and her ridiculous green and pink pajamas, and she opened her arms wide, prompt to embrace him. "Here, Daddy! Hug!" Gray grinned, stepped closer and hugged the little girl, who started to kiss his cheek repeatedly and giggling. Gray picked her up and her legs wrapped around his stomach. "Are you feeling better, Daddy?"

"How could I not be after this great hug? And all those kisses?" Gray asked her and she seemed delighted to have helped, her eyes sparkled just like Juvia's.

"Yay." She grinned. "Do you want toasts, Daddy? I have two." She showed him two little finger. "I can share if you are sad."

He shook his head and kissed her cheek. "I'm fine, princess. You can eat." He put her back on her chair and stepped closer to Gris' high chair and the boy was still dozing off between awake and asleep and Gray chuckled at the sight. "Someone partied hard last night." He said and picked the baby up from the chair.

"He slept way too late last night and woke up the same time he usually does in the mornings." Juvia told him with a giggle. "He doesn't know what to do now: sleep or eat."

"Hey, Gris." The little boy opened his eyes, also blues like Juvia's, and offered his father a sleepy smile, showing off his two bottom teeth. "So, what's gonna be, little man? Are you sleeping or eating?" As if to answer, Gris rested his head on his father's shoulder, his face hid on Gray's neck. "That's a straight answer."

"Give him here." Juvia said, but Gray shook his head.

"Let him here, I need this." He told his wife and she nodded with a smile, returning her attention back to the sandwiches she was making. "We are fine, aren't we, Gris?" The boy's only reaction was to grab Gray's short hair from the back of his neck, as he liked to do when almost falling asleep. "We are." Before he walked towards his chair, he kissed Juvia's cheek and messed with Violet's hair, making the girl giggle.

He sat down and looked to his family, glad he didn't lose it all those years ago, that Juvia had found her way back to him even then. He could never thank her enough for that.

But he sure would try to love her more than possible every day. It wouldn't be that much of a challenge; he already did, anyway.

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 **AN:** Juvia is coming back. There's no other way.

I hope this was fluffy enough to mend some hearts. Let's see what Mashima's next stunt will be. ;)

08/29/2016 ~ **BonneyQ**


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